When the World Cries, "WHY?" How Does the Church Answer

In the wake of events like the mass shooting in Florida last week, everyone always asks, "Why?" This is especially so when there have been children killed and wounded.  What can the church say in the face of such horrors. Is it enough to send up "thoughts and prayers." How do we comfort families who, like Job, cry to God asking "Why?"

First of all, we cannot explain why God allowed such a thing to happen. We don't know why. After all, God sees the end from the beginning. We cannot. So there are always larger issues at play that we cannot even fathom. We have families to protect. God has an entire universe to make safe and secure. Of course we do not understand. How can we?

We can, however, make a pretty good guess as to why young people have taken to shooting up their schools. That used to be pretty rare. Nowadays, not so much. Since the shooting at Parkland High, there have been at least two other planned attacks foiled in just the short time since it happened. They were foiled because people started to pay attention to the signs. One grandmother simply opened up the journal her grandson left sitting out on his desk. He'd been trying to get someone's attention all along, but everyone was too wrapped up in their own problems to notice his distress.

I can offer a two part answer to the question of "Why?"  Not as to why God allowed this terrible tragedy, but as to why it's happening more frequently.

1. Our young people too often have no spiritual anchor and, let's face it the teen and young adult years of a person's life are emotionally trying. We all remember how hard it was from our own youth. It's why teens and young adults have such an appallingly high suicide rate. Suicide is almost always a cry for attention by a child who is overwhelmed by it all. Suicide says "I am in pain and you aren't fixing it for me!" Kids commit suicide in part to stop their own pain, but also in part to inflict pain on those they see as responsible. They hope by this act to make sure people know they are to blame and feel bad about it.
2. In our 24 hour media environment, every time a kid shoots up a school he becomes famous for a few weeks. The news media, in effect, broadcasts the shooter's suicide note to millions upon millions of people. It's why such things often happen in clusters. One unbalanced soul sees that another equally unbalanced soul has got a huge amount of attention simply by shooting the people he blames for his trouble.  So, it suggests a way to go out in a big way and make lots of people feel bad for not fixing his problems for him.

The cure is for parents and schools to pay better attention to their children; to give the kids an anchor to hold them steady through the storms of adolescence. The church is uniquely qualified to offer such an anchor.  In our churches we secure the safety of our children by giving them real things to do in the church. We should listen to them sing, let them pass the offering plate, do special music, talk to the elders about what could be done to improve the youth program. We can take them camping, go to the lake for Sabbath School and potluck. Above all, we MUST spend time with them. We must give them a real stake in the life of the church and thus give them an opportunity to meet God and hang out with Godly people.

Rudderless kids often sink into despair. They feel ignored and mistreated and lash out. The difference between now and when kids used to drive to high school with a gun in the gun rack of their pickups without starting a random massacre, is that back in the olden days, such a thing would NOT have got you worldwide attention and your name splashed all over the television, radio and Internet.

Remember Satan's second lie. "Thou shalt be like gods." His first was "Thou shalt not surely die." The media provides both immortality and a godlike ability to wreak vengeance upon your enemies, both at the time of the killings and then over and over and over again for weeks afterward.

Until we stop giving fame to mass shooters, most of whom are trying to commit suicide anyway, this isn't going to stop and the devil knows it. He will use political wrangling over how to stop such shootings to further divide us. One of his favorite tactics is to make us think that somehow there is something we ourselves can do to stop horrors like this. Are we not gods after all? Write a law. Take away all guns. Force people to be good somehow and to stop murdering each other. In all the long history of the world, no law, no disarming of the people, no incentive ever offered has stopped the slaughter. Too often it is the ones writing the laws and taking away the arms that end up committing mass murder. More than 252 million people died in the twentieth century alone, at the hands of governments whose purpose was to make everyone good. No one but God can make everyone good and even He must allow evil men to die in the billions in order to do it.

While we cannot guarantee there will be no further shootings, we can make sure fewer of our children feel so lost and desperate that they feel like killing themselves and others. The truth is, only God can end this and sadly, because of the nature of sin and God's having given us the free will to choose whether or not to sin, we must wait until Jesus comes to fix it.

In the meantime, let us hold our children and young people close. Let us bind them with cords of love. Let us show them, by example, how to make their lives better by focusing their energies and attention on others. 

That's the answer the Church has when the world asks, "Why?"  Love your children better. Stop rewarding despair with publicity. Thoughts and prayers should come before something like this happens, not afterward.


© 2018 by Tom King

Shut-Ins: The Lost Tribe of Adventists

 When we do surveys asking what religion people are, we find that there are usually a lot more people who say they are Adventist than there are who come to church each Sabbath. Mostly we assume that's because people just don't want to come to church because they're too busy or someone's offended them or (my favorite) "I like to worship out in nature." 

I think there's another reason for the miscount. I think a lot of Adventists don't come to church anymore because they've gotten too old. I know because it's happened to me. Through a series of unfortunate events, my wife and I became isolated from our church and the church forgot we'd ever been there. 

For one reason and another, seniors are much more likely to find themselves without transportation and therefore, without a way to get themselves to church. In East Texas, my old stomping grounds, we did a survey that showed that one in five East Texans didn't have a reliable way to get to town to go to the doctor or get groceries. Many are virtual prisoners in their own homes. The other missing group is children. They don't drive cars. They are totally dependent on older people to drive them around.

These church members are too often forgotten by their own churches. I found that out when my wife and I moved up here to Washington State. We found a nice little church and, though my wife wasn't able to attend regularly, I started to. Unfortunately about a year later, I lost my ride and next thing I knew, we'd disappeared from my church's radar screen. I got a ride about two years later and everyone was surprised to see me. Most thought I'd gone back to Texas.

I've seen what happens when a church goes looking for its lost older members. Pastor extraordinaire, Ron Halvorsen Sr. breezed into my home town of Keene, Texas and began actively looking for lost members. He somehow managed to find something like 9 school buses, find drivers for them and create a maintenance and fuel fund.  We had about 800 coming to church (it's an SDA college town) and about 40 coming to prayer meeting in the youth chapel every week. Pastor Ron went out looking for children and old people and sent buses out into the surrounding counting collecting those who had been missing services.

The board balked at the cost of manning the buses, the liability issues and even the playing of guitars onboard during the rides.  But Pastor Ron, with the enthusiastic support of the congregation ignored the good old boys who thought they ran the church, and before we realized what was happening we had better than 2000 people in two and three daily services and 900 people at PRAYER MEETING! Can you imagine that?

We started youth prayer meetings for the kids, run by the kids and aimed at the kids. Kids came, often accompanied by parents and grandparents. The bus singalongs got more than a little rowdy and it wasn't just the youngsters. If you think Grandma has forgotten how to do "If You're Happy and You Know It" You've got another thing coming. It was a truly joyful noise unto the Lord.

I know, because me and my guitar were on those buses. Every Adventist Church, particularly in North America and Europe needs to go through their membership lists and find out who is missing. Once they find who and where those folk are, they need to go get them. A big yellow school bus is great for that. If some of your seniors have mobility issues, I can show you how to address that with a portable ramp you can run up to the rear exit door.

And you don't have to limit the use of the church bus to shut-in transportation to Sabbath services. If the kids are having a program at your school, go pick up folk and pack the audience with appreciative fans. If you've got a food bank in your church, USE IT!  Every month about social security check time, run around and pick up your non-driving or physically impaired members and take them to Walmart, the mall or to your church food bank. Organize trips to the park or to church recreational activities. If you hear about a free clinic going on in your city, get out the buses and go get people. Jesus said, "Go ye therefore into all the world..." If you can't be globe-hopping, you should at least explore the corner of your world. Besides those big buses running around town on Sabbath with the name of your church on it are a powerful witness, not to mention advertisement, for your local congregation.


It can be good for your church budget too. Seniors control the majority of the wealth in this country, but they don't donate to causes they don't participate in in some way. Make them active participants in the life of your church and you will see more money coming into the church coffers if that's what you're worried about.

Actually, if running a couple of buses to pick up non-attending members will, perhaps, minister to what St. Paul called "the widows and the orphans", then let nothing stand in your way. It's time we "come rejoicing" before the Lord and get to bringing in those lonely and isolated sheaves still standing out in the field with no way to get home. Gleaning the fields for left behind fruit is an ancient tradition with God's people.

© 2017 by Tom King

Pathfinders: How to Effectively Praise

      “Fathers, provoke not your children, lest they be discouraged.” Colossians 3:21

The modern world embraces self-esteem as the end-all/be-all of child-rearing goals. Convinced that poor self-esteem is the cause behind our children's rebellion and misbehavior, a generation of parents have poured praise on their children and have succeeded in producing a crop of what many observers have called "precious snowflakes" - spoiled bratty kids who expect the world to heap approval on them as a right rather than something one earns.

As youth leaders, we have a solemn responsibility to guide children toward responsible adulthood. We are called to walk the narrow line between lifting up children's spirits and indulging their worst impulses.  So do we do that by giving everyone a participation trophy and eliminating any recognition of hard work and effort so some kids don't feel inferior and have their self-esteem damaged?

I used to work with emotionally disturbed, mentally ill and abused kids. Many of them were seriously damaged. Most had virtually no self-confidence or self-esteem. My primary job there as a recreation therapist, a vocational counselor and equestrian therapist was to help build up the ability of children whose spirits had been crushed. These kids were like abused animals, lashing out at everything and everyone that got close to them.

It was at this time I found a wonderful book by a psychologist named "Haim Ginott" called "Between Teacher and Child".  He also wrote a companion book for parents called "Between Parent and Child." The new version was updated by his daughter and I haven't read it, but his earlier book was really a departure from the loosey-goosey and ultimately disastrous child-rearing philosophy of Dr. Spock.  Ginott talks about how to:

• Discipline without threats, bribes, sarcasm, and punishment
• Criticize without demeaning, praise without judging, and express anger without hurting
• Acknowledge rather than argue with children's feelings, perceptions, and opinions
• Respond so that children will learn to trust and develop self-confidence

One of Ginott's most powerful techniques for engaging children is a simple principle for praising a child effectively. Too often we think we can praise kids by telling them things like "You are a great musician" when they bang out a song on the piano. We hang their crayon artwork on the fridge and proclaim, "You are a great artist!"  We praise a good grade on a test by telling them they are "...so smart!"  And we do surprising damage to our children by doing so.

How? When we label children great artists and students and musicians, we judge them, something even Scripture tells us we are told not to do. The exhortation, "Judge not that ye be judged" doesn't just apply to negative judgment. "Praise, done lazily by applying labels, is ineffective at best and damaging at worst. You don't full kids. If you tell a child he is a good boy, he knows better. He knows you are a liar because he knows what ungood things he sometimes does.

A teacher once decided she was going to change her unruly class's behavior by building their self-esteem.  She walked into her classroom and started her class by telling her kids she knew it was going to be a "great day" because all the children in her classroom were all "good boys and girls". The classroom erupted. It was the worst day she'd had in her career.

So why would that happen? It's because when we lazily label a child a good something or other, we tell the child we expect that they will always be good at whatever it is we are praising them for. Many times, children will try to prove you are wrong. Then they don't always have to meet the perfect standards you evidently expect of them.  God showed us that with the children of Israel who thought they'd show God they were good enough to please Him.

When we praise children (and adults for that matter), says Ginott, we should avoid labels and instead tell the child what you like about what they have done. Even better, tell them how what they have done pleases you. Kids want to please grownups. The secret is to give them praise so that they know how to please you. They don't know. Targeted praise like this is like catnip to tabby cat. Once children know what gets them your approval, they will repeat this behavior over and over.

Let me tell you a true story that illustrates the power of targeted praise. This is one of the first times I tried Ginott's targeted praise technique. I worked with emotionally disturbed children who were really messed up. Most had concurrent diagnoses of mental illness, abuse, neglect and developmental disability. We were experimenting with an art therapy program. We later hired an artist to run it, but at first I did the art classes.

There was this one little girl who had a history of abuse and neglect. She didn't trust anyone and had difficulty bonding with adults in particular. During her first art therapy class, she was fascinated with the marker pens. She worked at her table for quite a while. I saw her jump up after a while and come to me with her paper in her hand. She presented me with a picture that was light blue on the top half and dark blue on the bottom half.

I was stumped as to how to praise the little girl. You don't use empty praise like "You're a great artist." (I'd just finished Dr. Ginott's book so I knew that kids don't fall for that). So I told her, "Hmmm. It's a shade of light blue and on the bottom it's a darker blue. I like those colors."

She immediately jumped to my aid. "That's the sky," she said pointing to the light blue, "And that's the water," she explained proudly.

"Oh," I sighed, relieved to know what the painting was about, "You have done a seascape." The little girl lit up like a Christmas tree and dashed off to do another picture. The next picture was the same blue on blue with a little green pyramid shaped thing in the boundary between the two blue spaces.

"An island!" I said, hopefully. She gave me a big grin and dashed off again. The next one had a little house on it. The one after that had a palm tree. Then the house gained a chimney, then the sky gained a cloud and the sun. Every time I mentioned the new addition, it remained in the next picture. If I forgot to mention the new addition - the bird she added or a window on the house, it got left out the next thing. The little girl is now 40 years old and lists me as her Father on Facebook.

Another of my helpers had a similar, but opposite experience with an young autistic boy in the class. The boy struggled to make a very detailed and actually quite stunning picture. When he showed it to his counselor, the counselor went for the easy praise. "You're a really wonderful artist, Chris," he said holding up the picture for everyone to see. Horrified, Christ snatched the picture back, crumpled it into a ball and threw away the evidence. He refused to do any more pictures. That one picture was evidence that he was a "great artist" and Chris knew that he wasn't always able to do work that was that good. So he shied away from even trying lest his counselor find out he wasn't a "wonderful" artist. 

You may not always see an immediate reaction from your kids when you use empty praise like that. Emotionally disturbed kids react much more quickly and demonstrably than normal kids do. Tell a regular kid that he or she is a great baseball player or a brilliant mathematician and they may smile at the praise, but they soon figure out you're blowing them off with the easy compliment.

Empty praise tells a child nothing about what pleases you. If he cleans his room and you tell him he's a "good boy", it says nothing about what he did right.  Try these techniques when you praise and you'll tell the child what he or she is doing that pleases you. Remember the child want to please you. When you give only empty praise and the only time you are specific is when he is doing something wrong, the the only thing the child learns is how to disappoint you. Try this:

1. Find specific things that the child does that please you.
2. Tell the child how what he or she has done pleases you.
3. Tell the child how what he or she has done helps you.
4. Show the child you appreciate what he or she has done.
5. Avoid telling the child what you think he or she is. 
6.  

When you are working with your Pathfinders, remember to keep your eyes open. Know what they are doing, especially when they don't think you are watching. When you let them know specifically what they did and why it was a good thing,  and what it meant to you, it's a very powerful thing. It lets the child know how to get your approval.  Most of the reason we get into trouble with kids is we aren't very good about telling them in detail what we want from them.  Oh, we're very good at telling them what they do wrong, which may be why they repeat that sort of behavior more frequently than they do the kind of behavior we want.

Instead of "Good job!" tell a kid "Wow, this floor really shines!" (if the floor really does shine). Show them something that they did well, let them know it pleases you, and they will repeat it. Don't tell a kid, "You're a great helper!"  Instead tell them, "Thanks, that really helped me get done with my work." The child then understands why you are pleased with them. You made it personal. 

If you're on a camping trip, pick out a group that did a good job pitching their tent. Walk around it, looking at the tent pegs, the tent poles and how they stowed their gear. Comment on everything they did right. Mention if the pegs are driven in at the proper angle, if the poles are set squarely and secured, or if the inside of the tent looks neat. Before you know it other kids will ask you to look at their tents too. Make the same kinds of observations with all of your kids and pretty soon you'll have a crackerjack tent pitching crew as they compete to draw your praise for their work. And each time you praise a specific thing, you teach them what they did right. The others will watch and learn.

This way you don't have to teach by criticizing. You teach by praising. I've seen too many Pathfinder "leaders" who thought they were drill sergeants and who treated the kids as if they were a part of some kind of a paramilitary organization. The point of summer camp and Pathfinders is to teach kids practical and social skills by having fun. Robert Rider, president of the Oklahoma Conference taught me that you can save more young souls by showing kindness, by paying attention and by remembering what your job is, than you can by by barking orders.

I took those lessons with me to my later work as a teacher, as a recreation therapist with emotionally disturbed and mentally ill children, and as a community organizer working with bipartisan groups to help people in need. Our jobs as youth and Pathfinder leaders is to lead, not drive. We show kids the way, with kindness, humor and clear signals. We mark the trail for our young people to follow. We let natural consequences teach for us when they stray and we welcome them back when they return to us, even if they are a little battered for having gone off track.

God says that he will be our children's teacher (Isa. 54:13). Our job is to go before them and show by example what mere words can never teach.  Jesus said let your words be well chosen. He didn't lecture. He told stories and let his listeners draw their conclusions. We all learn like children for most of our lives. Children want to know what to do that will please us. Let's show them by telling them we notice when they do the right thing.

© 2017 by Tom King

   

Youth Ministry: Backyard Ball Field Marker

Homemade line marker.

Acts 17:26 says - From one man he made all the nations, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he marked out their appointed times in history and the boundaries of their lands.

Boundaries are important, especially in working with kids. Kids need boundaries. If their boundaries are not clearly marked, they will push those boundaries until you absolute define what those boundaries are. This need for boundaries extends to children's play.

Here's a handy little device for making soccer fields, baseball, football and even grass tennis courts in your backyard or your church school playground for the kids. Let me just say this. A lot of people dismiss going to the trouble of marking a ball field for kids games. I think they are mistaken.

The first thing God did when he was ready to build a nation out of the rabble that came out of Egypt was to write down the rules and build a temple. The temple was the playing field on which the Hebrew people worked out their salvation with fear and trembling. The boundaries and layout of the temple was the field upon which the Children of Israel played out the plan of salvation.

I'm here to tell you that marking out the boundaries of a playing field and putting on a striped referee's shirt makes a difference in how the kids approach obeying the rules. The lines define the boundaries of the game. With lines the arguments over whether the ball or a runner were out of bounds are vastly reduced.

I worked with emotionally disturbed kids and found that my taking the time to mark out the lines on our playing fields changed the attitude of children who played on them. The well-marked boundaries not only helped make games easier to officiate, they also made the kids feel like our games were real games and that they had been admitted to a special place as privileged participants. The boundaries said, "You are important enough for us to have taken the time to make the playing field look professional.

I've been a Pathfinder leader, a recreation therapist, a PE teacher and youth leader working with a wide array of kids. I'm here to tell you. Mark your ball fields. It makes a difference.

You can buy field markers or make your own. The link below is to my article on building a simple homemade line marker.

http://howdyyadewit.blogspot.com/2011/02/make-your-backyard-ball-field-look.html#.WeGQHjtdpeM

© 2017 by Tom King

My First Mentor Retires

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My Dad took a flyer when I was four leaving Mom with three little ones to care for and without visible means of support. Until I was in my teens, my male role models tended to be fictional ones from books. Through a series of providences, however, I wound up newly baptized and granted a summer job at Lone Star Camp as a $10 a week trash collector, janitor and shovel operator. God had his hand in it.

The camp director that summer was a lanky theology student and outdoorsman named Sam Miller. Sam was a revelation. I'd joined the church because God argued me into a corner where I had to give Him a chance despite my own misgivings. I'd grown up in a church town where, as Sam later told me, "Adventists are like manure. Spread 'em out over a space and the do a lot of good, but pile 'em up in one place and pretty soon it begins to stink!"

The first leader God sent to educate me was Sam. Most of what I've come to know about working with young people, I learned from Sam that first couple of summers. He taught me to be a lifeguard and put me on track to become a Water Safety Instructor Trainer for the Red Cross and eventually the camp's waterfront director.

Old Sam (we called him that because he seemed so much older than the rest of us for some reason) had an easy-going way with young hormonally-charged staff members. It is a tribute to Sam that no children were either drowned or created during the summer's he herded our motley crew. He once led our whole staff in hijacking a Six Flags war canoe and altering its course. We learned to ski, built pyramids, skied on canoe paddles and raided the kitchen. We also knew where the line was with Sam and we pretty much didn't cross it - at least not any farther than we could safely draw back for the most part. 

I learned how to lead by example rather than by bullying. I learned that a soft answer does turn away wrath and I learned that a leader is a human being too. Old Sam is retiring and I'm sure he will be missed by everyone he works with.  I'm also sure that some of our "leaders" never quite understood Sam either. I put leaders in quotes because those are the kind of leaders that Sam taught me not to become like.

For more stories about Sam check out my personal weblog about him. I hate to seek a good man go, but I'm pretty sure Old Sam will still be around making a difference in the lives of young people for a long time yet.

© 2016 by Tom King

Church Fellowship: The Pizza Party With a Twist

This is what the finished pizza ought to look like.

Sometimes you just need to get the brethren and sisteren together for some old-fashioned fellowship. Here's an interesting twist on the pizza party that's sure to encourage people attending the event to talk to one another, share recipes, laugh and develop new relationships. The secret to stimulating all of this "fellowshipping" is simple.

Everybody helps make the pizza.

My wife and I used to do these with people we invited from the church. The party design is also simple:

1. Everybody who is invited is asked to bring some combination of cheese for the pizza, a jar of their favorite pizza or spaghetti sauce and all the creative kinds of pizza toppings they'd like on their pizza. Also ask anyone who owns a pizza pan or pizza stone to bring it. You'll need lots of these. In a pinch you can make the crusts on a sheet of aluminum foil and transfer the foil to a large baking sheet to cook.
2. Two hours before the party, make up dough balls for individual pizzas - one for each group you will divide the attendees into. With kids I'd put two in a group because each will eat half a pizza at least.  You can find the recipe for the never-fail pizza crust we used here at the Potluck Vegetarian. Just click on the link for full instructions.
3. As everyone comes in, have the stove heated to 450° to 500° and ready to go. Have them move to the tables, bars or counters where they will work with their group and give them a ball of dough. If you don't have a dough hook, give them a half-formed dough ball and let them knead the dough for about ten minutes. That'll settle the more ADD among the group. Kneading is hard work. That's why bakers have huge arms.
4. When the dough is ready, each group gets the ingredients they brought. Share the jars of sauce around. It doesn't take very much sauce. Make sure everyone has cheeses and whatever else they need.  Then go away and let them make a pizza. It's easy. They'll figure it out.
5. Make sure the floor is clean. Someone will inevitably try to twirl their crust. It never fails. We make guests take their shoes off. That way the floor is clean enough that you can brush off a dropped crust and cook it.
6. As the pizzas are made ready, put them in the oven two at a time. Put the top and bottom racks of the oven as close together in the middle as you can. Pizzas don't need much room. They're very thin. It only take 8 to 20 minutes depending on the thickness of the crust.
7. As they come out, cut the pizzas into 8 to 16 pieces so everybody can sample each others' pizza creations. Keep rotating the pizzas through the oven for the rest of the evening. The extra ingredients can be dumped into a big salad if you like. Have someone bring a lot of lettuce and tomatoes and suggest people bring their favorite salad dressing along to share.

For more details, go to "The Potluck Vegetarian" for the tricks and secrets to making perfect homemade vegetarian pizzas. A lot of people are confused at first when you tell them they have to make their own pizzas, especially the guys, but they will warm to their task I promise you. When their pizzas come out, they'll be worse than new papas showing off "their" pizzas and bragging on themselves and their pizza making technique.

It really is a lot of fun and stimulates a lot of conversation and good fellowship and you don't have to play any embarrassing ice-breaker games to get people talking.

Try it some Saturday night in the fellowship hall. It's tons of fun and educational for the kids - just make them wash their hands first - I'm just sayin'.

© 2015 by Tom King

Ministries: Engaging Youth Through Technology

You hear people lament about how technology is replacing human contact. We see alarming symptoms in our children, stumbling around texting in the midst of crowds of real people and missing out on the human contact we all need. We see them standing before great wonders with their faces stuck to a 3-by-3 inch screen. It is tempting to see all this new social media, smartphones and Facebook as something bad - something we should protect our children from. They need physical human contact, right? 

And I agree. The kids need to be drawn out. They need to play, explore and make connections, but while we're doing that, let's not overlook the opportunity for ministry to be found in technology and it's one you can get the kids involved in.

Physical human contact is all well and good if you can get it, but how many of us older folk would be talking together across the once vast distances between us were it not for social media? How many old friends would have found each other after all these years? How many shut-ins would be completely isolated without their computers and Internet connections. We can even Skype each other and see each others' faces. Even telephones don't help if you don't know what number to call to find an old friend when your kids are too busy to talk and too involved in their own lives to invest any time in yours anymore. Here we can do a search and find faces we know. Virtually, we are associating together more than ever before, even though we may not be able to jet around the world to be together physically.

Human beings have always instinctively tried to knit together communities of people we love. We are drawn toward things which unite us in whatever way we can find. It started out with drums and smoke signals and became books, letters, semaphore and telegraphs. Then telephones, radio, television and finally the Internet and social tools like email and Facebook. We have the technology to make our own movies, slide shows and ebooks. We finally have the video phone, smartphones that do almost anything. And it's all in the name of communicating one with another.

We are at the point in time where we can reach the whole world no matter how isolated any point is. The technology is inexorably reaching out to connect us. A man trapped in a crevasse on Mt. Everest can call his wife in Dallas, Texas to say "I love you."  I think we've been given a great gift. Can it be misused by foolish or evil men? You bet. But imagine the possibilities at our fingertips for reaching out to a dying and unhappy world. What a gift we've been given. 

As leaders of our youth, we have a responsibility to show our kids ways they can use this technology to do good rather than evil. To minister rather than to merely consume. Let me suggest a couple of projects you can get your smartphone addicted youth involved in that can become a personal ministry for them.


I. Checking In:  Start a ministry to the seniors in your church. Get cell phone numbers, especially from shut-ins and give each kid in your youth group a number of an older person to partner with. The purpose of these senior/youth partners is to provide the young person with a senior mentor and the young person with someone that he can bless. Instruct the kids to send videos, photos and texts to their senior partner every day to let them know what they are doing. Have them connect via Facebook, Pinterest or Instagram. If the senior doesn't know how to use these and has a computer, the young person should show them how to set it up. Teach the kids how to do these kinds of things for their senior partners.  Also provide materials to the older person to teach them how to mentor the kids - how to be a good listener, techniques like reflective listening, asking questions instead of giving commands.  The connection between older folk and the young can be very powerful.


II. Youth Producers:  Get your kids with camcorders and cameras to record events at your church. Teach them how (if they don't already know) to turn these into short 5-10 minute videos. That way every time the church has an event, the kids can produce a video about it that can be shown at church. Showing the kids' movies between services is a good way to get people to move on into the sanctuary. You will have to create some standards, of course, and review the films before they are shown, but by and large, let the kids do it. If you have someone who is a good writer and understands how to use film to tell a story or to make a point, that person can help your kids learn what video to shoot and how to use editing to make a point. You just need one or two adults who have an interest in that sort of thing to mentor the kids.  Let the kids do all the photography work, voice-overs and as much as possible the editing.  Your role is to enable them, to provide technical advice, not do the work for them. Some kids will gravitate toward doing this stuff and you can quickly move them into taking on tech jobs for the church.

III.  Sound and media crew:  Find the restless kids in the group, the ones fidgeting in their seats or wandering around in the lobby during service and train them up to run the sound system and the video equipment. They have way more energy than you and there's nothing quite so useful as a skinny kid when you're running LAN cable around in the attic crawl space. The cost of the technology needed to do a decent job of on-line video streaming the church service is going down every day. The big deal is the time needed to install and run the video system. Kids have way more time than we do. Find some you can trust and teach them how to be your church's most excellent tech support unit ever!

IV. Food Pantry:  If your church doesn't have a food pantry you should. Get the kids involved. You can get food from the local food bank. There may be a charge, but it's usually something ridiculously low like a penny a pound. Set up a room in the church somewhere for the program.  Set the room up like a little grocery store, right down to the checkout register. You can get software to read bar codes and inventory stuff, track expiration dates, check out customers, etc. Set up shelves and let the kids label them and sort things, create displays and do everything as though it were a retail grocery store. If you have room, let them set up your Dorcas clothing the same way. Help them complete displays of clothing and other things you provide for needy people in the community. You can set up a voucher system for people that allows them to come into the "store" and purchase a certain amount of food, clothing, etc..  It doesn't feel so bad for the people who need help, it helps you keep up your inventory and it gives your kids a taste of how a retail shop works.  And it insures all the donated food, clothing and personal items that come into your donation baskets get used. Get some old mannequins, recycled display cases. You can even put in a frozen foods and refrigerated foods section by buying older display cases that retailers have replaced when they remodel. You'll need an energetic, organized adult and a bunch of kids with an interest to manage the "store". Run it at regular hours evenings and maybe on Sunday or Saturday night. Work with other departments in your church to connect your Food Pantry operation with people who need help. You'll be surprised how many of your church's members may need your help, but no one has known how. Now you'll have a way to feed the hungry.  Call the store "Loaves and Fishes" or something like that. Get your church ladies to contribute baked goods and things.  Hook up with other Food Pantries in town and swap inventory. If they have too many potatoes and you have too many jars of peanut butter, you can do a swap between you. An organized, youth-run food pantry can be a wonderful ministry for your church.

The point is to connect the young people in your church with real ministries, something they will feel good about doing. It doesn't have to be a big thing. You could get a couple of kids to visit elderly church members who haven't been to church in a while. Have them find out if they need something. Are they having trouble feeding their beloved pet (the Food Pantry could stock dog and cat food)? Is there some way you could get them an Mp3 file of the church services that they could listen to if they can't get to church. Old laptops and retired smartphones or Mp3 players work well for that sort of thing.

An active church is an alive and growing church. We've got to quit designing programs to be built around the busiest people in the church - the ones who don't have time to do all the things we would want. It's time we grabbed the young people that are at the back of the church and fixing to drift out the door and give them something to do that they're good at and that we can give them support and encouragement for doing. That's how we will grow our church. That's how we will prepare our young people for lives of service.


© 2014 by Tom King

Ministries: How to Wear Out a Bunch of Hyper Kids in 30 Minutes or Less

© 2013 by Tom King

The Fox & the Hounds

 I learned a variation of this game from a book called "New Games", a book of games designed to promote play without an over-emphasis on competition.  Now the game itself is plenty competitive, but because of the structure, it encourages cooperation at the same time it encourages individual effort. It can be fun for a group even if the kids in your group vary in size, strength and speed.

The game is based on the old playground game "Tag You're It".  In traditional tag there's something of a problem that every teacher who's ever used it runs into. Whoever is "It" is the center of attention. Now some people really like being center of attention, especially kids with poor self-esteem.  So rather than running away they fake stumbling or taunt the person who is "It" so that they can get caught and then they run around pretending to chase people but never quite catching them. This keeps the game focused on themselves and everybody eventually ends up standing around waiting for the your egotist to finally be shamed into catching somebody so the game can go on.

The Fox and the Hounds variant turns the structure upside down and effectively uses the desire to be center of attention into a tool for making kids run their hearts out.  Here's how it works.

Materials:

• Large relatively open playing field.  A wooded park area is best as the trees will break up the chase and give the fox a chance.

• A 3 to 4 foot long "tail" made of cloth or canvas.  A strip of fake fur made up to look like a bushy animal tail is the most effective type of tail. I keep one in my games bag at all time.

•  Whistle for the referee. The whistle is useful for stopping the action when the tail is grabbed and for getting the attention of kids who are getting over-eager (like the kid that picked up a fallen tree limb and decided that braining the fox might be an effective means of getting that tail).

Method:

1.  Explain the rules and the boundaries to the kids.  Boundaries can be arbitrary, but should all be within clear eyesight of where the referee (and his whistle) is standing.
2. One player is selected as "It" or "The Fox". Let slip that in this game the fox is "It". It will make being the fox more desirable to the egotists who are usually the ones you want to tire out.  The Fox must tuck six inches of the tail into his belt or the back of his pants - enough to hold the tail securely, but no enough to carry the pants down to his ankles when someone jerks the tail loose.
3. The remaining players are designated "The Hounds".  The hounds must do two things.  First, they must chase the Fox and try to pull off his tail.  Second, they must bark and bay like hunting hounds while chasing the Fox.
4. At the start of each round, the Fox is given a head start before the hounds are turned loose.  The hounds must then chant the fox hunting song and when they are done, they may all take off after him.  The song goes like this:
   
         A hunting we will go, A hunting we will go
           Heigh, ho, the derry 'o, A hunting we will go
         We will catch a fox, We'll put him in a box
           We will pull his furry tail and then we'll let him go.  
   
   
   A hunting we will go, a hunting we will go
   Heigh ho, the dairy-o, a hunting we will go
   A hunting we will go, a hunting we will go
   We'll catch a fox and put him in a box
   And then we'll let him go
   Read more at http://www.lyrster.com/lyrics/a-hunting-we-will-go-lyrics-children.html#ajoC4otcRv7ipgtf.99
5. Whoever relieves the Fox of his tail becomes the new Fox and you start over with the chant to give him a head start.
6. The referee must watch the hounds.  Any who are not baying or barking like hounds are ineligible to catch the fox.  Advise the hounds to be sure and bark when grabbing the foxes tail.  It doesn't count if you forget till afterward.  The barking slows the hounds slightly because it takes some of the wind out of them.
   
7. The fox must not touch his own tail, shorten it or pull it out of reach with his hands.  Warn the fox not to take a loop around his belt to make it harder to pull the tail. It's a good way to get hurt by being pulled off your feet or slung into a tree or to lose your pants altogether.  The ref should check to see that the tail is removable with an ordinary tug. 

This game is exhausting. There are always plenty of egotists who want to be it, but in order to keep the coveted title of "Fox" the egotist must run like the wind because everybody is out to snag his tail. The game stays active because even if you have a fast fox, the hounds inevitably do what wolves do with their faster prey.  They simply take turns running the fox till he tires out and then they corner him and remove his tail.  If you catch the kids doing it, it's a good teachable moment to tell the kids that what they are doing is what wolves do to run down faster prey.  They take turns chasing the animal until he tires.  Chasing the animal in wide circles allows the other wolves to rest and pick up the chase with fresh wolves when the prey comes round again.


The game encourages the fox to run so he can keep the coveted tail and the hounds to pursue him in order gain the tail.  The kids will come up with some surprising pack hunting strategies all on their own, many of them just the sorts of strategies used by lions, cheetahs, wolves and hyenas. The kids inevitably run themselves to exhaustion in 20 or 30 minutes.  When they are all sprawled out on the grass gasping for air, it's a good time to go to campfire and then off to bed. They'll sleep pretty well that night, I promise you. The beauty is that you, the referee can handle the whole bunch while your fellow adults take a quick break AND you don't have to run around after the kids. The action circles you. I used to have this tall stump I liked to "referee" from. 


As I always say, "Old and crafty beats young and energetic every time!"


Tom King

Master Guide Secrets: Getting Your Boats to the Beach

Unloading canoes safely requires close adult supervision.

(c) 2013 by Tom King

You've piled all the canoes on a rented trailer or tied them to the tops of Pathfinder leaders' cars and driven to the lake.  You've got a whole bunch of small Pathfinders or Adventurers with you and the parking lot is 200 yards from the water. Here's the problem.

You have all these excitable kids swirling around the parking lot and threatening to make a break for the woods or toward the lake.  If all the adults in the group wind up carrying canoes the 200 yards to the lake, kids are going to be lost in the forest or in danger of falling in the lake and drowning.

On the Trinity River with canoe class -1975

There are two ways you can control the kids.  You can yell at them and make them stand at attention in platoons in the parking lot until you've moved all the canoes down to the lake.  This is not the best way to start a happy day at the lake.  The other way is you can tie them all up and stack them in the grass till you're done.  This tends to make parents quite unhappy when they find out about it.  Seriously, though, there's a third way to handle transporting canoes to the beach safely and without losing kids in the forest.

Step 1: Assign two adults to each boat and assign the kids by unit to each boat.  Two grownups and maybe 8 to 10 kids can handle a boat and if you let the kids help, you can keep track of them. Park the kids out on the grass or an open spot by unit.

Step 2:  Remove the boats from the trailers or cartops and set them out on the grass, evenly spaced.  If the kids are small it's better not to have them underfoot while you are unloading the boats. Have the kids waiting at the spot where you set the unloaded canoe.  There will be more canoes than there are groups if you plan to load two to three kids per canoe. 

Step 3:  Collect the gear for each canoe.  Have one adult or older Pathfinder in charge of the canoeing gear like life jackets, canoe paddles, coolers and canteens.  Send kids from your group back to the cars two at a time to pick up gear for the boat.

Step 4:  Tie the gear in the canoe, then turn it upside down.  You canoe should have a painter (rope) attached to either end that can be used to tie paddles and jackets under the seats and thwarts.

3 person overhead carry: Note stronger adult in center.

Homemade beach cart for carrying canoes.

Step 5:  Turn the boat over and pick it up.  Have the kids surround the upside down canoe and reach under the gunwales and prepare to lift.  Put the largest members of your group at either end to spot the boat.  Have the kids lift at once.  If the distance is short, just carry the boat at waist level.  If the water is some distance away, lift the boat to your shoulders and carry it. Make sure that no child is carrying a critical load. Use this rule of thumb: If the boat will fall if any one kid stumbles and drops his part of the boat, don't carry the boat that way.  In the 3-man carry to the left, if the kids stumble or drop their end, the boat is still balanced by the experienced adult.  If you are with an older group or small kids, this handy canoe cart made from PVC allows you to carry a canoe comfortably by yourself if the path is fairly level.  They are fairly easy and inexpensive to make, can be made to disassemble and allow a smaller or older person to move a canoe or kayak without hurting themselves.  The kids can walk beside the boat to stabilize it (and that way you know where they are). 

Step 6:  Set the boats down along the shore rightside up and ready to launch.  Have the kids place the life-jackets, paddles and coolers in place.  Be sure and tie down any loose objects like coolers.  Coil the painters (end rope) and put the out of the way in the bow and stern of the canoe where they can be easily reached. Make sure every canoe has a sponge to use as a bailer to keep the boat dry.

Warnings:

A quiet cove is a great place to practice paddling & safety.

• Don't let the kids walk in the boats when they are on land.  It tends to crack the ribs and loosen rivets in aluminum canoes, causing them to leak.  
• Do some basic training before you turn the kids loose in canoes. Teach the kids basic safety principles and paddling techniques BEFORE taking them out on the water. The Pathfinder Canoeing Honor suggests a course of study.  Find a Red Cross or American Canoeing Association certified instructor if you can find one.
• Do NOT take inexperienced canoers out in moving water of any sort (surf or rivers). Spend a lot of time learning how to control and balance the boats in still water before you take a group out on any waters.
• When traveling in a group, always place an experienced paddler in the front and back of the group to lead and to pick up stragglers.  There will always be one canoe you wind up having to tow, so have plenty of rope in the last canoe for hooking onto worn out and inefficient boats.
• Learn to paddle well yourself. Poor paddlers work themselves far too hard.  If you know your strokes, you will be far less tired than the kids are by the end of the trip and better able to bring in the group.

Resources: 

This article only covers getting the boats to the water.  For more information about canoeing here are some helpful links:

1. Handy pickup bed canoe rack
2. Homemade canoe trailer
3. Backyard or lakeside canoe storage rack 
4. How to carry a canoe on top of your car
5. Carrying a canoe on your car's luggage rack
6. Canoe safety
7. Supervising youth canoe outings
8. Garage ceiling canoe hoist

Feeding the Five Thousand (or the Fifty)

The Haystack - The Perfect Dish for Feeding Massive Numbers of Young People

(c) 2013 by Tom King

Hawaiian Haystack

If you find yourself with a visiting academy choir, a traveling youth group, starving Pathfinders on a Saturday night or any group of hungry people, here's an alternative to loaves and fishes - The Haystack!

This delightful Adventist invented and promulgated potluck standard is supposed to have been invented by a Seventh-day Adventist named Ella May Hartlein sometime back in the early 1950s.  Apparently her family had a craving for Tostadas and could not find a Mexican restaurant close to their home.  Ella May got creative with a bag of Fritos and some salad fixin's and the rest is, as they say, history.  

This imminently practical potluck dish swept Adventist church potlucks like wildfire and soon every state in the union had their own version of the dish.  Adventist missionaries carried the idea overseas and there are now versions of the ubiquitous and versatile vegetarian dish found all over the world.

I have personally delivered the secret of haystacks to the Lutherans (prodigious potluckers themselves) and apparently the Amish and Mennonites have their own versions of haystacks too. It still amazes me that so many people have no idea what a haystack is and have never tasted one.  It's very sad that so many should be so deprived.

Haystacks start out with a bed of Fritos.  Unless you are in Texas, and then it's usually tortilla chips, unless you are in Asia and then it starts out on a bed of rice. There are other versions elsewhere, but you get the idea.  Some sort of carbohydrate forms the base.  Beans are almost universally the next layer, though vege-burger or some other protein substance comes next.  Pisco-vegetarians have been known to sprinkle fish over rice or tortilla chips for protein.

Next comes the salad ingredients which are as varied as are salads themselves.  Lettuce and tomato are pretty standard.  In Hawaii, haystacks tend to include some bits of pineapple and other tropical goodies. I've seen northern versions made with baked beans whereas in Texas we tend to use Ranch Style pinto beans. I've seen them with chow mein noodles, nuts, any number of salad dressings and toppings and salad veggies.

In any case, haystacks are easy to prepare.  They are flexible for feeding large groups because you can set out the ingredients and leave unopened bags and bottles and jars of fixin's in the kitchen and add a bit at a time to keep up with the demand of a hungry potluck crowd without wasting food.  Unopened stuff can go into storage till the next time a horde of ravenous teenagers descends on your church.  

Also, the ingredients aren't very expensive so you can feed a lot of people, stuff them full of food and the serving line goes pretty quickly.  If you've got a group coming and don't know what to feed them, think haystacks.  Kids never get tired of it and no matter what age they are, they can create a haystack that only has stuff they like on it (unless their mother is standing behind them in line and then they'll probably have to eat some vegetables). 

If you'd like an ingredient list or instructions for making the standard haystack try my Howdyadewit weblog for Texas Style Haystacks or join the Haystacks group on Facebook for ideas and opinions.  Apparently there's a group and a Fan Page on Facebook for Haystacks - they're that popular. We've had knock down drag out fights over there about whether tortilla chips or Fritos are the proper base for a haystack.  Some people get downright religious about their haystacks, I'm telling you.

The truth is, you can be totally creative with it.  That's why God gave us free will.  If for nothing else, it got us some pretty tasty (and wildly creative) haystack recipes.

I'm just sayin'

Tom

Becoming a Master Guide

(c) 2012 by Tom King

One responsibility of Adventist men is to mentor our young people. The church offers a nice basic training course for would be youth leaders in the form of the Master Guide program. The Master Guide Program, according to the General Conference of Seventh-day Adventists website is at the highest level of Adventist Youth Ministries.

Apparently, not quite the highest level, though.  Since I got my Master Guide work completed, they've added three more levels.

You have to be 16 or older to be a Master Guide. The completion of the course allows you to wear the patches and scarves and things in the picture above along with your Pathfinder uniform and to sign off Pathfinder honor cards for your Pathfinder club.

Master Guides serve the church in all areas of the Youth Ministry including Adventurers, Pathfinders, youth/young adult and Youth Emergency Service Ministries. The elements of the course emphasize in-service training and active pursuit of new skills in church youth leadership. Every church needs a Master Guide or two.

It takes a while to earn it, but it's not too difficult given the level of reading and study most of us Adventists do as a matter of course. Just to give you an idea of what it will take:

I. Prerequisites:
   A. Be at least 16 years of age.

   B. Be a baptized member of the

        Seventh-day Adventist Church

   C. Complete a basic staff training course in

         one of the following:
        1. Adventurer Ministries

        2. Pathfinder Ministries

        3. Youth Emergency Services

        4. Teen / Young adult ministries

II.    Spiritual Development
    A. Read the book Steps to Christ.

    B. Complete the devotional guide Encounter Series I, Christ the Way.

         read each day.

    D. Demonstrate your knowledge of the 28 Fundamental Beliefs by completing

         one of the following:
         1. Write a paper explaining each belief

         2. Give an oral presentation on each belief

         3. Give a series of Bible studies explaining each belief

         4.Conduct a seminar, teaching each belief.

    E. Enhance your knowledge of church heritage by:
         1.  Reading The Pathfinder Story by John Hancock

         2.  Earning the Pathfinder Church Heritage Award

         3.  Reading a book about church heritage such as;

              a.  Anticipating the Advent by George Knight (a brief history of
                   Seventh-day Adventists)

              b. Tell It to the World by Mervyn Maxwell (the story of Seventh-day

                   Adventists)

              c.  Light bearers to the Remnant (denominational history college

                   textbook) Books are available from the ABC or AdventSource.

 III.   Skills Development
        A. Supervise participant's through either the Adventurer class curriculum
             OR AY class curriculum.

        B. Have or earn the following AY honors

            1. Christian Storytelling

            2. Camping Skills I

       C. Earn 2 additional AY honors not previously earned.

       D. Have a current first aid certificate

       E. Attend and complete a 2-hour seminar in each of the following areas:

            1. Leadership Skills br />

            2. Communication Skills

            3. Creativity and resource development

            4. Children and youth evangelism

 IV.   Child Development
       A. Read the book Education       
       B. Read either the book Child Guidance OR Messages to Young People

       C. Read a book OR attend a 3-hour seminar dealing with child development

            about the age group of your ministry

V.    Leadership Development
       A. Read the book Leadership is an Art by Max de Preez, OR a current
            leadership book of your choice.

       B. Demonstrate your leadership by doing all of the following:
            1.  Develop and conduct three worships.

            2.  Participate in your local church children’s/youth group in a conference-

                 sponsored event.

            3.  Teach three Adventurer awards OR two AY honors

            4.  Assist in planning and leading an Adventurer, Pathfinder, or Sabbath

                 School field trip.

            5.  Be an active Adventurer, Pathfinder, YES, or AY staff member for at

                  least one year, and attend 75% of the staff meetings
        C.  Write goals in which you would like to accomplish in your ministry.

        D.  Identify three current roles in your life, one of which is spiritually oriented,

              and list three goals for each.

VI.   Fitness Lifestyle Development
         A. Participate in a personal fitness plan for three months, and evaluate and
              show improvement (recommended: the Cooper Aerobic program or its
              equivalent).

REFERENCES:

1. General Conference Word on Being a Master Guide
2. Qualifications
3. Master Guide Checklist and Record Card
4. Master Guide Record Book

    C. Keep a devotional journal for at least four weeks, summarizing what you